Chit Chat

[altruistRor]

my requirements in a girl are simple => must be family oriented, must be willing to take role of a homemaker, must cook and take responsibility of my kitchen, must be willing to bear kids as soon as possible and ABOVE ALL MUST NOT BE A CHHINAAR - last being most important thing

The requirements you mentioned are simple but rare as well. I can assure you on the bold part(CHINAAR), you wont see such girls in tier3 or 2 cities, so don't worry about that.

Bw working and non working, I would suggest you to go with non-working since you're getting a stable govt job. If at all you're enforced, go for a teacher. She'll have enough time to look after your family. Primary teacher or TGT is preferable.

I'm sure, some relatives or family friends must genuinely care about your well-being. Choose proposals only through these connections. Proposals from weak middlemen(bicholia) or matrimonial sites are red flags. Every marriage life has ups and downs, strong middlemen always create pressure on both parties in case something really goes south.

Never go for a girl who has a better financial background than yours. Never go for a girl taller than you.

Always ask for girl's bio-data/resume before setting up a meeting. Meet girl's family only if you feel it's a green flag. Never take a vist to girl's family for granted. Meet only if you're genuinely interested. Family is hurt when someone says no to their daughter after seeing her.

Rest you'll learn with the experience and leave to the god.

 

[sameer]

finally, like your typical lower middle class fellow, my requirements in a girl are simple => must be family oriented, must be willing to take role of a homemaker, must cook and take responsibility of my kitchen, must be willing to bear kids as soon as possible and ABOVE ALL MUST NOT BE A CHHINAAR - last being most important thing

Currently going through the whole AM shitshow right now

For your preferences:

Look for girls that were not raised in big/Tier 1 cities.

The whole urban AM scene is a big disaster rn due to previous relationships/body count wagera. Matrimonial apps are literal scams that have done nothing but drained my monies.

And if you want a woman who doesn't/might not work, look for ones with BA english/History/commerce degrees etc and not STEM since It's difficult to even get a job with those degrees in the current market.

For other qualities, try to meet the girl at least a couple of times and filter for those. If you're getting matches though family, they'll do the initial character vetting, but you should also do your own checks. And also investigate SM profiles.(for your last bolded line)

 

[johny_baba]

The requirements you mentioned are simple but rare as well

of course that's why i bolded the most important parts,
must be family first type, and mustn't be a chhinaar
rest if a person is good enough i may be persuaded to make compromises, though apart from reasons above, my reason behind not going after a working wife is, my parents are aging old fast and i want them in caring hands - while those career woman chhaps wouldn't even have work-life balance to tend my home; and I want us to enjoy our married life instead of both of us always on run for work; finally i want her to be a good mother to my future kids who could least be available in their lives

another reason, most working wives just have that peculiar attitude towards their husbands if, god forbid, their earnings go above their husbands; have seen it all from up close in my big family

on the bold part(CHINAAR), you wont see such girls in tier3 or 2 cities

not really true bhai, i've seen enough around my locality (i'm a gujarati btw, and i'm aware of kind of image our womenfolk have among others ) to disapprove of this claim, and i've lived in tier 4 to tier 3 place in my life so far

I'm sure, some relatives or family friends must genuinely care about your well-being. Choose proposals only through these connections. Proposals from weak middlemen(bicholia) or matrimonial sites are red flags. Every marriage life has ups and downs, strong middlemen always create pressure on both parties in case something really goes south.

hhmm that's a good advise there, to be vary of 'middlemen' (or middlewomen in my case); though matrimonial sites are not my thing as my caste community regularly shares available bio-datas and proposals among interested for no charge

Never go for a girl who has a better financial background than yours. Never go for a girl taller than you.

first part's understandable, but what's problematic with taller girls though? not that it's some kink of mine but i'm a bit shorter than vladimir putin and height is not something i can really dominate someone with, so gotta make do with whatever's available

Always ask for girl's bio-data/resume before setting up a meeting. Meet girl's family only if you feel it's a green flag. Never take a vist to girl's family for granted. Meet only if you're genuinely interested. Family is hurt when someone says no to their daughter after seeing her.

that's also a good advise, 'specially the last part, to only show interest in visiting them if it seems promising enough

if you want a woman who doesn't/might not work, look for ones with BA english/History/commerce degrees etc and not STEM since It's difficult to even get a job with those degrees in the current market

arey bhai some mausi to my father even proposed a 10vi fail girl for me, no joke, happened when i was unpopular among family and earning peanuts in my itkoolie job at beginning - and still i was willing to at least check that girl's biodata and photo; it's another thing that my father never let it all reach to me and outright rejected after hearing about that
i don't give a damn about educational qualification of a girl here, i wholeheartedly believe modern education is a big fuckin' scam and does nothing but wastes a person's time (and drain them of their good years) - 'specially in case of womenfolk aspiring to be wives someday - it's more of my father or family's thinking that "tumhare STATUS ke anukul toh padhi likhi honi chahiye"

so yeah, good advise to look out here

For other qualities, try to meet the girl at least a couple of times and filter for those. If you're getting matches though family, they'll do the initial character vetting, but you should also do your own checks. And also investigate SM profiles.(for your last bolded line)

of course i was thinking about 'courtship' thing with future prospects, to take them to chill places like coffee shops and have heart-to-heart conversation over our primary priorities and all; as for vetting them out, i don't trust my extended family guys here - i've personally seen cases of some extended family chhinaars being married off to well set good boys and those fuckers are only turning up to me now when i'm having a chance at stable gormint job; unki niyat me khot hai ; and strangely enough my extended family is far richer than mine and consequently have all sort of liberandu woke mind viruses among them (for e.g. a certain daktor in family got himself castrated vasectomy-ed after births of two daughters because "ham bete aur beti me anpadho ki tarah farak nahi karte, ham do hamare do ho gye bas bahut hai" )

i'm going to have to rely on alternate meanings for vetting of character, past things and all

 

[johny_baba]

hello again to all

last time i posted on chit chat, i mentioned about difficult phase i was going through in life; but things have taken a turn for me, and seems a good turn at it,

mostly my parents' health was the root cause, but they are doing fine, my siblings got married in last marriage season and most importantly,

there are chances i may get a government job within next three-four months

(sidenote, as a believer in jyotish, i'm going through shani sade sati final phase, and i've seen lots of things in last five years through it, so yeah)

now, something about me to explain my case here
- started working as a low paying frontend developer thing (i do javascript coding mainly) in 2021, stuck to same line of work, recent market disruption in field of IT for us low level coders due to all saturation from available candidates and AI boom further ruined my chances to hop on different career paths in IT, so i mostly stuck around with whatever was available
- through these years, starting from my college till now, most relatives of mine in extended family, never bothered much with keeping up with me - i don't get any diwali greeting or anything ever on whatsapp, they don't call me, even on occasions of family gathering and all, i'm mostly treated like an invisible person - i used to blame it on my introverted persona but lately after understanding some looksmaxxing and stuffs, i have come to accept it that i'm simply not desirable in their eyes; so i eventually made up my peace with it and moved on
- now, my father...after getting it that i might get a govt job...he blew the bugles among family about this "win"
- all those fuckers in my extended family who ever looked down on me, showered me with congratulations all sudden i was like, ok it happens
- but most interesting thing that's happened-happening in my life right now, these same relatives who treated me like nothing ARE COMING FORWARD WITH MARRIAGE PROPOSALS FOR SOME GIRLs IN THEIR EXTENDED FAMILIES OR SO FOR ME... so far i've received three different proposals

i know i should be happy and all, but rather, i'm simply sceptical or even outright distrustful of these fuckers who are trying to woo me and my family now just because i could get that sweet cosy (not really) and 'stable' govt job and i certainly don't want to become that 'option' for those alleged bigadi baap ki beti - i simply don't have capacity except violence to handle such things

so i'm asking for your big brotherly advise here, all my experienced DFIans-DFBans; i'm of course at that age to be married off and willing to settle down, but keeping all realities in mind, this is what i seek

- i don't really care about looks as long as a girl's presentable enough, i don't even mind if she's taller than me (and i'm relatively on shorter side ), i give rat's ass to my perception or "status" among muh samaaj or family about my life partner-to-be
- i have aversion towards working women, and i don't want a wife already doing or planning to do any job; but thing is my kanjoos father wishes to tie me up with some working woman as he believes "aaj ke jamane me dono log kamaenge toh hi ghar chal paega"
- ideally i wanted to uplift a poor family girl from my caste through marriage, but same as above, my kanjoos father would not approve of such things
- i have not been to much relationships or even friendships with girls, and i'm extremely anti-social when it comes to things like most "shaukh" muh hobbies prevalent among normie youth like movies, tv, cricket and partying-dining out etc - i'm more like an otaku nerd type who takes enjoyment in singular hobbies and have niche interests (well my presence on a defense forum is sufficient to tell that) ; but due to all that i feel "outdated" to break the ice of discussions among public or feel like i perhaps won't be able to relate with most girls of this era; and i don't want to pick a wrong life partner as this is 'make or break' type of decision for my life
- finally, like your typical lower middle class fellow, my requirements in a girl are simple => must be family oriented, must be willing to take role of a homemaker, must cook and take responsibility of my kitchen, must be willing to bear kids as soon as possible and ABOVE ALL MUST NOT BE A CHHINAAR - last being most important thing

so, i'd like your pov, opinions, suggestions et al about this, oh you all DFIan-DFBan friends here with lots of experiences in your respective lives

of course that's why i bolded the most important parts,
must be family first type, and mustn't be a chhinaar
rest if a person is good enough i may be persuaded to make compromises, though apart from reasons above, my reason behind not going after a working wife is, my parents are aging old fast and i want them in caring hands - while those career woman chhaps wouldn't even have work-life balance to tend my home; and I want us to enjoy our married life instead of both of us always on run for work; finally i want her to be a good mother to my future kids who could least be available in their lives

another reason, most working wives just have that peculiar attitude towards their husbands if, god forbid, their earnings go above their husbands; have seen it all from up close in my big family



not really true bhai, i've seen enough around my locality (i'm a gujarati btw, and i'm aware of kind of image our womenfolk have among others ) to disapprove of this claim, and i've lived in tier 4 to tier 3 place in my life so far



hhmm that's a good advise there, to be vary of 'middlemen' (or middlewomen in my case); though matrimonial sites are not my thing as my caste community regularly shares available bio-datas and proposals among interested for no charge



first part's understandable, but what's problematic with taller girls though? not that it's some kink of mine but i'm a bit shorter than vladimir putin and height is not something i can really dominate someone with, so gotta make do with whatever's available



that's also a good advise, 'specially the last part, to only show interest in visiting them if it seems promising enough



arey bhai some mausi to my father even proposed a 10vi fail girl for me, no joke, happened when i was unpopular among family and earning peanuts in my itkoolie job at beginning - and still i was willing to at least check that girl's biodata and photo; it's another thing that my father never let it all reach to me and outright rejected after hearing about that
i don't give a damn about educational qualification of a girl here, i wholeheartedly believe modern education is a big fuckin' scam and does nothing but wastes a person's time (and drain them of their good years) - 'specially in case of womenfolk aspiring to be wives someday - it's more of my father or family's thinking that "tumhare STATUS ke anukul toh padhi likhi honi chahiye"

so yeah, good advise to look out here



of course i was thinking about 'courtship' thing with future prospects, to take them to chill places like coffee shops and have heart-to-heart conversation over our primary priorities and all; as for vetting them out, i don't trust my extended family guys here - i've personally seen cases of some extended family chhinaars being married off to well set good boys and those fuckers are only turning up to me now when i'm having a chance at stable gormint job; unki niyat me khot hai ; and strangely enough my extended family is far richer than mine and consequently have all sort of liberandu woke mind viruses among them (for e.g. a certain daktor in family got himself castrated vasectomy-ed after births of two daughters because "ham bete aur beti me anpadho ki tarah farak nahi karte, ham do hamare do ho gye bas bahut hai" )

i'm going to have to rely on alternate meanings for vetting of character, past things and all

requesting big bros here to take संज्ञान and provide your valuable insights, opinions, suggestions et al whatever's possible

@ezsasa @Vinash @haldilal @SKC @Azaad @Anants @Roshan @Aaj Ka Hero @angryindian @shade2 @LETHALFORCE @Suryavanshi @iNorthernerOn9 @Miss Firing @The Juggernaut @jaijaganath @Corvus Splendens @Vishnugupt @Anonymous Bharata @spikey360 @why so serious? @Blademaster @bablu666 maulana @rock127 @Captscooby @Aditya10r @Binayak95 and all seniors and well read members from DFI-DFB

 

[Azaad]

requesting big bros here to take संज्ञान and provide your valuable insights, opinions, suggestions et al whatever's possible

@ezsasa @Vinash @haldilal @SKC @Azaad @Anants @Roshan @Aaj Ka Hero @angryindian @shade2 @LETHALFORCE @Suryavanshi @iNorthernerOn9 @Miss Firing @The Juggernaut @jaijaganath @Corvus Splendens @Vishnugupt @Anonymous Bharata @spikey360 @why so serious? @Blademaster @bablu666 maulana @rock127 @Captscooby @Aditya10r @Binayak95 and all seniors and well read members from DFI-DFB

Don't ask too many people for advice. You'd be totally confused. Never take advice on a given topic from more than 2 people , if possible only one but that one ought to be someone truly wise who not only enjoys yours but some kind of universal respect & confidence for his wisdom . Otherwise advice are like A Holes . Everybody has them.

 

[SKC]

requesting big bros here to take संज्ञान and provide your valuable insights, opinions, suggestions et al whatever's possible

@ezsasa @Vinash @haldilal @SKC @Azaad @Anants @Roshan @Aaj Ka Hero @angryindian @shade2 @LETHALFORCE @Suryavanshi @iNorthernerOn9 @Miss Firing @The Juggernaut @jaijaganath @Corvus Splendens @Vishnugupt @Anonymous Bharata @spikey360 @why so serious? @Blademaster @bablu666 maulana @rock127 @Captscooby @Aditya10r @Binayak95 and all seniors and well read members from DFI-DFB

If you can get into Govt Job, then do get it. Then take some time ~6-10 months to settle down in the job.

Then plan for next phase of life - marriage. Check all profile you get and try to meet the girls and develop understanding.

We have habit to declare all girls few names, but the guys are no clean themselves. Even with all westernization or urbanization the chances of meeting a problematic life partner are still below 10%.​

 

[Vishnugupt]

requesting big bros here to take संज्ञान and provide your valuable insights, opinions, suggestions et al whatever's possible

@ezsasa @Vinash @haldilal @SKC @Azaad @Anants @Roshan @Aaj Ka Hero @angryindian @shade2 @LETHALFORCE @Suryavanshi @iNorthernerOn9 @Miss Firing @The Juggernaut @jaijaganath @Corvus Splendens @Vishnugupt @Anonymous Bharata @spikey360 @why so serious? @Blademaster @bablu666 maulana @rock127 @Captscooby @Aditya10r @Binayak95 and all seniors and well read members from DFI-DFB

Few points

1) Life will teach you us everything, better learn early than late. Things you haven't learnt in 30s will learn in 60s after suffering great loss.
So never run from occasion, be it marriage or fight or discussion or participation.

2) Maintaining good relationship with family is extremely important, from your words it looks like you don't have good relation.
Don't treat yourself precious when it's come to family or relatives. Be always humble and forgiving. Always engage with them, respect them. It should be your duty.

Family shows real mirror to us and source of pure love. Allmost all people suffer into their life when they disconnect with family.

3) Marriage is more about handling rather than chosing a good girl.
When I went to see the girls for marriage. I asked One question " What do you think about marriage?" I married none who didn't reply my question or replied keeping themselves on centre stage. I met many fraud family and girls.

Still better if you chose girl careful, be more engaged in talks and habits. Keep observing them.

Remember marriage is building a house which also consists of family and relatives. If girl is not thinking all of this then it's a red flag.

My wife went to look after my family during deadly COVID wave in 2021 before marriage. When I was out of India.

Overall engaging with people is the key, it seems you have not very social point. This also implies you must be poor in handling the situation because you must have got a rigid personality.

I think you need to improve a bit. If you have habit of replying "No" when it's come to participating in social events. Control it.

Best of luck.

 

[125mm_Smoothbore]

where is @Mr.Evil nibba didnt see him post for a long time

 

[username unkown]

I recently went to my old school where we have wall dedicated to our hero's who made supreme sacrifice for our country now look closely at each photo
Students drew tilak and mustache with pen on hero's
This gen is gen*u ,rotten

 

[rock127]

requesting big bros here to take संज्ञान and provide your valuable insights, opinions, suggestions et al whatever's possible

@ezsasa @Vinash @haldilal @SKC @Azaad @Anants @Roshan @Aaj Ka Hero @angryindian @shade2 @LETHALFORCE @Suryavanshi @iNorthernerOn9 @Miss Firing @The Juggernaut @jaijaganath @Corvus Splendens @Vishnugupt @Anonymous Bharata @spikey360 @why so serious? @Blademaster @bablu666 maulana @rock127 @Captscooby @Aditya10r @Binayak95 and all seniors and well read members from DFI-DFB

Bro, I read your posts. All I can say is a LOT of today's girls/women are DRUNK on FEMINISM and attention they get on social media. They have turned social media site into a defacto KOTHA! The sudden independence they have got has corrupted their brains specially that Beti padao bachao type campaigns and pump from the LAW and Govt. This has resulted in cultural degradation which started in 1960's in the West. Atul Subhash's case just highlighted this issue 100x. I can tell numerous cases which I personally know but too long to tell.

Very few women are there who are good wifey material. Having said that doesn't mean you should stop finding one. Rather accept a less good looking one(even less educated) from a decent family rather than some good looking one having bad family past or her own list of bf's. This is what Chankiya said. Check how strong is his dad's influence in the family. Patriarchy was there for a reason but Feminism is 100x worse. Many other things you already mentioned so that's good.

Don't ask too many people for advice. You'd be totally confused. Never take advice on a given topic from more than 2 people , if possible only one but that one ought to be someone truly wise who not only enjoys yours but some kind of universal respect & confidence for his wisdom . Otherwise advice are like A Holes . Everybody has them.

Partially agree! It's better to have advice from those people(s) who have some EXPERIENCE of life. Specially who knows your persona well and the life goals and successful in life.

For example, a youngster asking another 2 youngsters with zero/little experience of relationship is not going to help much.

 

[Yuyutsu]

'China's GDP is 5X that of India...': Startup founder warns of grim future for hardworking Indians

Shrivastava blames political complacency and short-term populism for India’s sluggish progress. "What kind of a meaningful future do you see for hardworking Indians?" he asked, calling out policies that prioritize giveaways over merit-based growth.

www.businesstoday.in

so according to this mofo's logic , india lost aksai chin even with bigger or almost same economy to china in 1962.
another Soros wh0re dying for attention.

 

[Suryavanshi]

View: https://youtu.be/-ugSZT7LfUQ?feature=shared

Some areas of Delhi are a worse shithole that Patna which is an achievement in its own way.

 

[Anants]

requesting big bros here to take संज्ञान and provide your valuable insights, opinions, suggestions et al whatever's possible

@ezsasa @Vinash @haldilal @SKC @Azaad @Anants @Roshan @Aaj Ka Hero @angryindian @shade2 @LETHALFORCE @Suryavanshi @iNorthernerOn9 @Miss Firing @The Juggernaut @jaijaganath @Corvus Splendens @Vishnugupt @Anonymous Bharata @spikey360 @why so serious? @Blademaster @bablu666 maulana @rock127 @Captscooby @Aditya10r @Binayak95 and all seniors and well read members from DFI-DFB

Congratulations on Securing Government Job, Johnny!

Regarding marriage, it's a lottery and karma game. Get your kundli matched based on actual kundali to avoid fakes. Have meetings with the girl and clarify certain things upfront:

a) Family Living Arrangement
- Parents will live with you
- You'll take care of them
- Expect your life partner to stand beside you in this

b) Household Skills
- Ensure she knows how to cook and clean
- (Note: By "cleaning" I mean ability to organize personal space, not expecting others to clean after her)

c) Expectations Management
- Ask what she expects from marriage
- Could range from:
- Buying SUV
- Exotic vacation trips
- Be prepared or clarify your own priorities

d) Financial Contribution
- If she's salaried, gently communicate expectations about sharing expenses

e)Personal Habits
- Carefully and creatively inquire about:
- Partying habits
- Drinking preferences

f)Religious
Ask what her beliefs are and how she practices and what is her expectation of spouse.


- Real nature reveals itself after 6-12 months
- Marriage is work; both partners must contribute
- The problem with most matches is they expect a Adarsh Sanskari Pati but site themselves being modern followers of feminism to shun any their share of responsibility.


(Above points are Applicable to both rural and city girls)

Some find gem partners from diverse backgrounds. Don't generalize. Seek God's blessing for a life partner who makes your life experience and learnings net positive.

 

[Mr.Evil]

where is @Mr.Evil nibba didnt see him post for a long time

Happy new year brother sem ending exams aarhe hai gand ghisai chl rhi hai